(Photo: Associated Press)
(Photo: Associated Press)

By JASON SINGER, Guest Columnist

You know that awkward moment when you say something and then some karmic event occurs that makes you stick your foot in your mouth? That is precisely what happened to Mitt Romney when a storm of epic proportions wreaked havoc on the East Coast.

Super Storm Sandy reminds me a bit of my ex-girlfriend: leaving 94 dead, millions without power, and billions of dollars’ worth in damages. Unfortunately, this country is still coping with the rough relationship it had with its last girlfriend Katrina, the last thing it needed now was another toxic relationship.

But Sandy didn’t just Chris Brown the East Coast. She left Romney with a bit of a bruise himself.

During last year’s GOP debates, when Romney was asked about FEMA (Federal Emergency Management Agency) and whether or not it should go bankrupt he responded with a confident, “Absolutely.”

Mitt continued to say: “Every time you have an occasion and take something from the federal government and send it back to the states. That’s the right direction. And if you can even go even further and send it back to the private sector, that’s even better.”

That’s right East Coasters, stop your complaining! Who cares if you are going to the local grocery store in an inflatable tube, paddling around like Tom Hanks in Cast Away? What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. And the emergency fund money that could help you survive, will now go to Wall Street and private equity firms.

Now some of you may think this is a political commentary. Frankly, it is not. But seeing as reveling in awkward moments is a favorite hobby of mine, I couldn’t help but appreciate what a masterful painting of awkwardness was depicted on camera when Romney was asked on 14 different occasions by news crew and reporters about FEMA and he had on that Crest-Whitened, robotic smile that makes me question whether he is human or not and simply said nothing at all.

This played out as he turned one of his political campaigns into a ‘food drive’ for Sandy’s victims. And my oh my, what a pleasure it was to watch Romney lifting boxes of food into a truck to be driven to the East Coast. You see? The whole nation was scathed by Sandy’s wrath. So I don’t know why all those people in New York, Delaware, and New Jersey are whining. If Mitt Romney is doing manual labor, then maybe 2012 is the year the world ends after all.