By JASON SINGER, Staff Columnist
Ah, yes — the New Year.
It’s a time when billions of people worldwide make promises to themselves they will never keep. I myself joined the bandwagon and made it my personal New Year’s resolution to be more tolerable of stupid people come 2013. And that promise nose dived faster than the Hindenburg.
There is one organization in the United States that is composed of 3 million of some of the dumbest people in our country; the sole reason my resolution was blown out of the sky.
The National Rifle Association.
After 59 people were injured in Aurora, Colorado when a lunatic decided to open fire on moviegoers, politicians took to every news outlet in existence to preach how bad guns are. Then election season came and Aurora was put on the back burner because politicians put the more important things first: keeping their jobs.
And then Newtown happened and once again, people were horrified at such unspeakable violence. Some say that silence is worth a thousand words, so it was almost priceless when the NRA remained silent for an entire week after the Newtown massacre.
But the NRA’s Vice President, Wayne LaPierre, took to the stage and single handedly destroyed my resolution by saying, “The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.” What a genius! It doesn’t help either that the NRA’S official ‘unofficial’ slogan is ‘Guns don’t kill people, people kill people’.
That’s right, that bullet should have a guilt-free conscious when it comes to murder. The NRA’s next proposal is going to arm all preschoolers with AK-47 automatic rifles to ensure the faculty and peers’ safety. Members of the NRA argue it is their Second Amendment right to bear arms, but does the Constitution say anything about households being stocked with military grade weapons capable of firing hundreds of bullets and launching grenades?
One NRA member commented how shooting machine guns “…are fun. Like driving a Lamborghini.” Watching big explosions are fun, but you don’t see me lobbying for everyone to have a nuclear bomb in their backyard.
Just to give you an idea of the type of people who belong to the NRA, a majority of them buy guns from Walmart. That’s right. Walmart. You know, that family oriented, religiously-backed company that doesn’t support two people of the same gender getting married because it is wrong but thinks $420 billion in annual profits last year alone with a large chunk due to gun sales is okay.
So here we are, in lovely 2013 where people are just as dumb, if not dumber, as they were in 2012. I will just sit back, relax, wait for some member of the NRA to get elected president and watch that sinking boat known as America’s future. But look on the bright side: The grass is always greener…when there are a bunch of guns on the other side.
Isn’t that how the saying goes?