A game of cat and mouse

By NADINE ZEBIB, Staff Writer 

 

Call me a pessimist, but meeting your soulmate at a coffee shop is a cliche and unrealistic idea invented by romantic comedies. When was the last time someone actually got or gave out a number at a coffee shop? Forget the venue. The actual act of getting someones number that you met in a random place is quite rare.

You know how it goes. You’re waiting for your coffee and the guy studying for his GRE to your right is staring at you and you can feel it. After 30 seconds of panicking that you’ve got spinach in your teeth, you look up as he’s looking away. You play eye-tag for roughly ten minutes. Just as your order is ready and he’s is about to miss his chance, he’s at your side, asking the barista for a refill on his already half full cup of water. Who drinks water at a coffee shop anyway? It’s irrelevant, and so is that weird off putting necklace he’s wearing because you like everything else you see about him. 9 out of ten.

He breaks the ice by making awkward conversation about why you asked for no foam. “Uh, I don’t like foam.” you say, which is followed up with ten seconds of silence that feels more like an hour. But you recover and help him out, because he’s got great hair and a decent sense of style. He should ask for your number, you think. You two laugh at the expense of the old man in the corner with the intense handlebar mustache who’s reading the Times. He gets his water. There’s some awkward eye shifting, and then… he walks away.

Is that it? Yes. It is. As girls, we think it’s our given right to do absolutely nothing about getting a man’s attention because they should do all the work. But most guys are too scared to put themselves out there, and part of me doesn’t blame them. If he’s too forward, he’s a creep. And there’s that horrible chance he’ll get rejected. If he’s too subtle, he’ll end up sitting two tables away from that cute girl the whole night, playing eye tag. But at least that’s safer.

It’s an unfair game where the rules are in favor of the women. So guys keep quiet until they’re in a situation where they regularly see a girl. For example, if you’ve got a class with a guy and there’s clear attraction, he’ll probably ask for your number a couple of classes in. (Or maybe more. Guys are slow.)

Take matters into your own hands. Girls, if you’re tired of sitting around waiting for “Prince Charming” or whatever other ridiculous ideas Disney planted in your heads at age three, do something about it.  If you’re thinking “no way” because there’s a chance you’ll be rejected — good. Now you’ve got some insight on how the guys feel every day. So don’t doll yourself up and sit pretty hoping to get more than a cup of coffee at Starbucks. Get up and go for it, or leave overcaffeinated and single as ever.