Three years ago when I began working on The Michigan Journal, I had no idea what I wanted to do for dinner, let alone for the rest of my life. As the years have gone by, I’ve changed my mind more times than Kim Kardashian has found “the one” and while I may now have a grasp on what I may do with my life, I’m not sure if I’m ready to face it quite yet.1535525_359878584161525_2008755160944552116_n (1)

This past Wednesday marked my last first day of school. Come April, I will be a college graduate, God willing. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I’m a sucker for nostalgia and will probably be making similar statements every day until commencement. Both the miniscule, “this is my last October 15 of undergrad” and the more substantial “last Christmas party” will set the theme for this last year. Despite that, I can’t say that I haven’t created a countdown calendar for the office or am already thinking of how I will celebrate submitting my last paper.

The countdowns, the nostalgia, and the subsequent tears are just the pre-courser for what’s to come: being a grown-up. You can tell I’m not ready because I am still referring to adults as “grown-ups”. While I currently have more responsibilities than most students I know, it all seems like a breeze to the real responsibility of adulthood.

Not only do I run this paper, I also am currently the President of UM-Dearborn College Panhellenic, an active sister of a Panhellenic sorority, a Rho Gamma, hold a part-time job as a server, and am hoping to begin an internship within the next few weeks. Again, a breeze. Soon, I will be in a career that requires more of me than asking “what two sides would you like?” AND, that’s assuming I even get a job because we all know how well the job market is for recent college graduates in $30,000 of debt and anxiety issues.

While I have this fear of life-long responsibilities, I am more fearful of the change. No longer will I spend my time in the same office I have for the past three years. Or walk through the UC wearing letters, waving to every third person I see, because I’ve known them since orientation five (gasp) years ago. Or head to my favorite OSE staff member’s office, because I’m about to have a mental breakdown and need someone to reassure me. (Don’t worry; I’m sure I’ll still be sending you thousands of emails and texts daily.) Or go to the Student Government office, because I want to learn more Arabic words.

It’s memories like these that will truly make leaving this community so difficult. UM-Dearborn has been my home for the past four years. It’s been where I have laughed, cried, slept, and grown up. And on April 13, when I am a bigger mess than Britney circa 2007, when I will say goodbye to my sorority sisters and my beloved newspaper, I will know deep down that I’m ready. I will know because this campus, these professors, these administrators, and these friends have helped me prepare for the real world. They’ve been my support and biggest cheerleaders and I know they will always be there to welcome me home.